Nosebleed, Brainbleed

The last time I felt like my nose is bleeding of boredom and irritation was during my sophomore year in UP, in a class with a super boring professor, who loves to tell nonsense stories and crack corny jokes to prolong our stay in her class... one day I decided to end my agony by tapping my ballpen on my desk as hard as I could... as if by doing that, I could tell her, "Enough! We're not interested in your corny jokes. Can't you see nobody is laughing? We'll die of nosebleed and brain hemorrhage just by listening to you . It's time for us to leave!" Silence followed...my classmates looked at me...then my prof with a motherly concerned voice said, 'Bakit ka naiiyak?'...embarrassed but still irritated, I tried my very best to smile and said, 'Wala po.'

Yesterday, I attended a meeting to represent my boss. Since it is supposed to be my boss' meeting, expect that I will be with older people who are all bosses of their respective agencies all over the Philippines. Good thing I asked my colleague to accompany me and we represent the Southern Tagalog Consortium. When the meeting started, we didn't know that every Consortium needs to report the updates of our programs. We're not prepared at all. But I did report, on the spot, remembering every activities that we've done and trying to answer everybody's query. I didn't know what I sounded like that time. My feet under the conference table was shaking...whether it is caused by the very low temperature inside the room, or nervousness, I didn't know. Thank God the formality of the meeting was broken because of the stories shared by the older ones. The first session turned to be a very interesting and very interactive discussion.

In the afternoon, boredom and irritation hit me. You see there are still many agenda to be discussed and there are those who keep on talking nonsense... Ok I take it back. They're not nonsense, but what I wanted is that they go directly to the point because time is running so fast. I wanted to go home and rest. But then, segues are always part of every meeting like this, so I took a deep breath and counted from one to ten... I will be fine. But the segues seem to grow unstoppable. At that very moment I wanted to shout. My brain is bleeding. I wanted to tap my ballpen on the table just as I did before... But of course I didn't. I can't.

I didn't know how the meeting ended because I started to entertain myself by making doodles on the papers. Nevertheless, I was happy that I survived the nosebleed and brainbleed for the second time.

'Ok then, class adjourned,' my prof said after awhile. My friend-seatmate was still laughing hard after we went out of the classroom because of what just happened. Some of my classmates even thanked me. But I was never proud of what I did. That's so childish of me to act that way and I promised myself that it would be the first and last time to do such a thing.